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 Answer submissions for Part 1 / Questions 1-5

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Jason
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PostSubject: Answer submissions for Part 1 / Questions 1-5   Mon Oct 08, 2007 9:47 am

Please post your writing responses for the free online TOEIC writing test task (questions 1-5) here. You do not need to log in or register to post your writing, simply click on POSTREPLY.

Please answer all 5 questions in the one posting and number them 1-5.

Please allow at least a couple of days for an OnlinEnglish.net Administrator to view and respond to your task. Responses will be limited to a score and some generic comments targeting the areas you could improve in.

Good luck!


Last edited by on Tue Oct 16, 2007 7:29 pm; edited 1 time in total
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PostSubject: Re: Answer submissions for Part 1 / Questions 1-5   Fri Oct 12, 2007 3:00 pm

lmsanche wrote:
Question 1: The cab just drove thru the front of the airport terminal

Question 2: This street is so crowded

Question 3: These peopke are about to enter the building

Question 4: Mary and John are enyoing the market very much

Question 5: The train arrived as Mark check the time

Hi Imsanche, and thanks for trying out Part 1 of the TOEIC writing test.

This section (qu. 1-5) is graded out of 15 points, with up to 3 points total for each of your sentences. Bear in mind that to get a perfect 3, your sentence must be grammatically correct, use correct spelling, use both word prompts, and have a clearly meaningful connection to the picture concerned.

Your total score for this section is: 10

Your scores for each question:
1. 2/3
2. 2/3
3. 2/3
4. 2/3
5. 2/3

Suggested corrections:

1. The cab just drove away from the front of the airport terminal.
2. This street is so crowded with cars.
3. These people are about to enter the building.
4. Mary and John are enjoying the market very much.
5. The train arrived as Mark checked the time.

Other tips:
Be careful to use periods (full stops) at the end of sentences.
Don't use careless spelling like "thru", "peopke" and "enyoing".
The word "crowded" by itself infers people, so if you want to use it with objects you need to state those objects - "crowded with cars".
Use consistent tense in sentences - if the train arrived (past tense), then you should also say "checked" (past tense).

Hope these tips helped you and good luck with TOEIC writing!

- Jason
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PostSubject: Re: Answer submissions for Part 1 / Questions 1-5   Fri Oct 12, 2007 3:11 pm

maximus wrote:
1. There are several buses in the front of the airport terminal.
2. There are so many cars on the street.
3. People are talking about their work.
4. The couple are shopping something in the market and look very happy.
5. The train is just coming as the man is watching his watch.


Hi maximus, and thanks for trying out Part 1 of the TOEIC writing test.

This section (qu. 1-5) is graded out of 15 points, with up to 3 points total for each of your sentences. Bear in mind that to get a perfect 3, your sentence must be grammatically correct, use correct spelling, use both word prompts, and have a clearly meaningful connection to the picture concerned.

Your total score for this section is: 12

Your scores for each question:
1. 3/3
2. 3/3
3. 2/3
4. 2/3
5. 2/3

Suggested corrections:

3. These people are talking about their work.
4. The couple are shopping for food at the market and look very happy.
5. The train is coming as the man is checking his watch.

Other tips:

In question 3, without a "the" or "these", saying just "people" infers all/any people in the world. You want to refer to the specific people in the picture.

We say "shopping for" + object.
Why say the couple are shopping (for) something when you can clearly see they are buying food? Be as specific to the picture as you can.

We usually use "just" with a perfect construction (the train has just come) to indicate recent time. Otherwise it can sound like an "only" action (there is just one train).

We say "check my/your/his/her watch". To "watch a watch" is grammatically possible, but sounds very strange and probably confusing for a native speaker.


Hope these tips helped you and good luck with TOEIC writing!

- Jason
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PostSubject: Re: Answer submissions for Part 1 / Questions 1-5   Fri Oct 12, 2007 3:29 pm

ciccina wrote:
1 There were two buses in front of the airport terminal
2 The street was so small that we had to drive very carefully
3 Four people were talking about the meeting
4 They found a very cheap market
5 As I entered the station I saw the train arriving

Hi ciccina, and thanks for trying out Part 1 of the TOEIC writing test.

This section (qu. 1-5) is graded out of 15 points, with up to 3 points total for each of your sentences. Bear in mind that to get a perfect 3, your sentence must be grammatically correct, use correct spelling, use both word prompts, and have a clearly meaningful connection to the picture concerned.

Your total score for this section is: 15

Your scores for each question:
1. 3/3
2. 3/3
3. 3/3
4. 3/3
5. 3/3


General tips:

I have given you full marks for these sentences, but I'm not exactly sure just how fussy the ETS markers are going to be with these tasks. You *may* get penalized a few points, based on these factors:

- You really should be entering a period (full stop) at the end of each of your sentences.

- Be careful using past tense when talking about current/"now" pictures. The pictures have a "here and now" feel about them and I would advise using present tense to reflect that.

- Be careful building too many inferences into your answers. In question 3, we have no evidence that a meeting has taken place, so I would recommend using "a" meeting to make it sound more general (not definite with "the"). In question 4, there is no evidence from the picture that the market is cheap.

- I'm not certain it is a good idea to put yourself or your actions into the pictures. I just worry that the markers might think you are building too much in the way of possible or inferred action. Personally I think that is creative and great, but to be safe and give yourself the best chances for perfect scores I would stick to describing what you can see, not what you can imagine.


Hope these tips helped you and good luck with TOEIC writing!

- Jason
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PostSubject: Score / Feedback for Yay   Wed Oct 17, 2007 5:49 pm

Yay wrote:
1.the front of the airport terminal is conjuced with different types of transport vehicles.
2.the both side of the street is lined with so many cars.
3.the people near the window pane is discussing about something.
4.the couple in the market looks very choosy about their potatoes.
5.while waiting for the trian to arrive the man takes a glimpse at his wristwatch.


Hi Yay. Thank you for trying out Part 1 of the TOEIC writing test.

This section (qu. 1-5) is graded out of 15 points, with up to 3 points total for each of your sentences. Bear in mind that to get a perfect 3, your sentence must be grammatically correct, use correct spelling, use both word prompts, and have a clearly meaningful connection to the picture concerned.

Your total score for this section is: 10

Your scores for each question:
1. 2/3
2. 2/3
3. 2/3
4. 2/3
5. 2/3

Suggested corrections

1. The front of the airport is congested with different types of transport vehicles.
2. Both sides of the street are lined with so many cars.
3. The people by the window pane are discussing something.
4. The couple in the market looks very choosy about their potatoes.
5. While waiting for the train to arrive the man glimpses at his wristwatch.

Other Tips

Always begin a sentence with a capital letter.

The use of the word ‘congested’ may not be appropriate for the given example. The word means crowded, packed, overfilled not quite the picture you see. I would have used a word such as ‘busy’.

The definite article ‘the’ as many functions. The mistake in sentence 2 is that ‘the’ is used to represent one specific thing when in fact you are alluding to two things. The=1, both=2.

Subject verb agreement sentences 2 and 3. The people are.

We do not say that people are discussing about something because it becomes redundant.

Be as specific as possible. For instance, in sentence 5 you write ‘takes a glimpse at’ when you could have written glimpses at.

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PostSubject: Score & Feedback for Lindaxu   Wed Oct 24, 2007 9:05 pm

lindaxu wrote:
1. There are a lot of cars and people in front of the airport terminal.

2. Shadowed by skyscrapers on both sides of it, the street looks so narrow and dark.

3. I guess, these people are talking about the funny movie which is just on the air yesterday.

4. The vegetables look very fresh in the farm market.

5. The man looks so frustrated, looking at his watch, as the train comes much later than that on its schedule.

Hello Lindaxu, and thank you for attempting Part 1 of onlinenglish’s TOEIC writing test.

This section (Q. 1-5) is graded out of 15 points, with up to 3 points total for each of your sentences. Take into account that to get a perfect 3, your sentence must be grammatically correct, use correct spelling, use both word prompts, and have a clearly meaningful connection to the picture concerned.

Your total score for this section is: 12

Your scores for each question:
1. 3/3
2. 3/3
3. 2/3
4. 2/3
5. 2/3

Possible corrections

3. I guess these people are talking about the funny movie which aired last night.

4. The vegetables look very fresh at the farmer’s market.

5. The man looks so frustrated, looking at his watch, as the train comes much later than scheduled.

Additional aid

I applaud your effort in trying to make nice complex sentences, but at this point I would advise you to stick to simple constructions. This is because in the first section you lose a point the moment there is an error in your sentence.

I would avoid making inferences, as you have done with question 3. Your sentence is very creative, but it does not reflect the picture accurately. For example, if you had written “On a warm day, four people are standing outside a building talking about something.” The sentence isn’t as creative as yours yet it represents the picture accurately.

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PostSubject: Score & Feedback for Janice   Wed Oct 24, 2007 9:44 pm

Janice wrote:
1.In the Front of the Airport terminal, i see a flag raised on a flag pole.
2.Both sides of the street is parked with so many cars.
3.People near the window is having a meeting.
4.Both the man and the women in the market picked the very fresh vegetable.
5. As the train arrives, the man takes a glimpse at his watch.

Hello Janice. Thank you for attempting Part 1 of onlinenglish’s TOEIC writing test.

This section (Q. 1-5) is graded out of 15 points, with up to 3 points total for each of your sentences. Take into account that to get a perfect 3, your sentence must be grammatically correct, use correct spelling, use both word prompts, and have a clearly meaningful connection to the picture concerned.

Your total score for this section is: 10

Your scores for each question:
1. 2/3
2. 2/3
3. 2/3
4. 1/3
5. 3/3

Possible corrections

1. In front of the airport terminal, I see a flag raised on a flag pole.

2. Both sides of the street are lined with so many parked cars.

3. People near the window are having a meeting.

4. Both, the man and the woman in the market, pick very fresh vegetables

Additional aid

Be aware of capitalization. Sentence one has 3 errors dealing with capitalization.

Look for subject/verb agreement. This is a problem with sentence two and three. “both sides … is…” and “People … is…”

Keep your sentences in the present tense. By writing in the past tense you are not focusing on the picture any longer. This is a problem with your fourth sentence. The people in the picture, did not choose anything, they are looking at or picking/choosing fresh vegetables.

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PostSubject: Feedback and score for Ahmed   Sat Nov 03, 2007 5:16 am

AHMED wrote:
THIS IS A PICTURE OF AN AIRPORT TERMINAL FROM THE FRONT
SO THIS IS THE STREET WHERE YOU ARE STAYING
FOUR PEOPLES ARE TAKING ABOUT SOME TOPICS
THE MARKET IS VERY CROWDY.
I HAVE MISSED THE TRAIN AS I HAVE MISSED BEFORE.

Hello Ahmed. Thank you for attempting Part 1 of onlinenglish’s TOEIC writing test.

This section (Q. 1-5) is graded out of 15 points, with up to 3 points total for each of your sentences. Take into account that to get a perfect 3, your sentence must be grammatically correct, use correct spelling, use both word prompts, and have a clearly meaningful connection to the picture concerned.

Your total score for this section is: 7

Your scores for each question:
1. 2/3
2. 2/3
3. 1/3
4. 1/3
5. 1/3

Possible corrections


1. This is a picture of the front of an airport terminal.
2. See below.
3. Four people are talking about a project.
4. See below.
5. I have missed the train as I have missed it before (see below).

Additional aid


I think that your sentences only offer little information about the pictures and you are not trying to infer or guess to much from what you see. This is evident in sentence number four which is very vague. Try to draw on your own knowledge to bring some more meaning to the pictures so you can write sentences which convey more meaning to the reader.

Please write the sentences with proper punctuation and capitalization. All your sentences are in capital letters and some do not have periods.

Sentence number 2 is something you would find more in spoken discourse rather that written. I would change the entire sentece.

For sentence number 4 you have written a sentence that really represents the background of the picture. It would be better to focus on the couple in the picture.

Your use of the word as in sentence five is not exactly clear. It reads like you are attempting to make a comparison in a rather poetic way, but I believe you are just attempting to refer to the man missing the train in the same manner. Adding it, seems to improve the clarity of the sentence. In addition, I do not agree that the man has missed the train because the train appears to be coming toward him.

I hope that these tips aid you in your preparation.

Dean



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PostSubject: Feedback and score for Jorams   Sat Nov 03, 2007 5:58 am

jorams wrote:
1. This is the font view of a typical airport terminal wherein you can see people and cars, come and go.
2. A red colored car parked in the street seems so obvious.
3. A group of people in front of the glass window is talking about a project.
4. The couple is picking potatoes just adjacent to the very ripe tomatoes at the market.
5. As the train approaches the station, the man can not help to look at his watch from time to time.

Hello Jorams. Thank you for attempting Part 1 of onlinenglish’s TOEIC writing test.

This section (Q. 1-5) is graded out of 15 points, with up to 3 points total for each of your sentences. Take into account that to get a perfect 3, your sentence must be grammatically correct, use correct spelling, use both word prompts, and have a clearly meaningful connection to the picture concerned.

Your total score for this section is: 11

Your scores for each question:
1. 0/3
2. 3/3*
3. 3/3*
4. 2/3
5. 3/3

Possible corrections/suggestions

1.This is the front of a typical airport terminal where you can see people and cars come and go.
2. The red car parked on the street seems so obvious.
3. A group of people in front of a glass window is talking about a project.
4. A couple is picking the potatoes which are adjacent to the very ripe tomatoes at a stand in the market.
5. None.

Additional aid

In your first sentence you did not spell front correctly which completely changed the meaning of the sentence.

In your other sentences I am wondering about your use of the articles a and the in your second and third sentences. In the second sentence it reads as though the street is familiar to the writer but the car is not. In your third sentence it reads as though the glass window is somehow important because you use the definite article the, but the people and the topic are not very important because you use the indefinite article a. Your use of articles is fine, but I am wondering if you are aware how your use of articles has shaped the meaning of each sentence. If you are not, I suggest that you do some additional study on how articles function.

In your fourth sentence it is not clear whether or not the couple or the tomatoes are adjacent to the potatoes. In your sentence there could be two separate stands - one which offers tomatoes and one which offers potatoes. Also, notice how I have changed your use of articles in this sentence. Can you see how the articles shape the meaning in the sentence?

I hope that my tips help you.

Dean
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PostSubject: Feedback/Score for Ecrosari   Mon Jan 07, 2008 3:07 am

ecrosari wrote:
There are cars in front of the airport terminal

2. There are few cars on the street, so there is no traffic.

3. The people in the lobby are talking about the theme of the workshop.

4. The vegetables in the market are very cheap.

5. The man is waiting for the train as it comes in.

Hello Ecrosari.
Thank you for attempting Part 1 of onlinenglish’s TOEIC writing test.

This section (Q. 1-5) is graded out of 15 points, with up to 3 points total for each of your sentences. Take into account that to get a perfect 3, your sentence must be grammatically correct, use correct spelling, use both word prompts, and have a clearly meaningful connection to the picture concerned.

Your total score for this section is: 14/15

Your scores for each question:
1. 3/3
2. 3/3
3. 2/3
4. 3/3
5. 3/3

Possible corrections

3. The people standing in front of a building are talking about the theme of the workshop.

Additional Aid

Your sentence are very good, but try to stick to what you see in the picture. For example, there is nothing indicating that the vegetables are cheap.

a lobby = a vestibule or entrance hall

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PostSubject: Feedback/Score for Neverlan   Mon Jan 07, 2008 3:55 am

Neverlan wrote:
1-the parking is in front of the airport terminal
2- the street where many cars parked is so quiet
3- there are four people talking about their job in the lobby
4- the woman is choosing the very fresh and good foods at the market
5- the train arrives on time as the man waits

Hello Neverlan.
Thank you for attempting Part 1 of onlinenglish’s TOEIC writing test.

This section (Q. 1-5) is graded out of 15 points, with up to 3 points total for each of your sentences. Take into account that to get a perfect 3, your sentence must be grammatically correct, use correct spelling, use both word prompts, and have a clearly meaningful connection to the picture concerned.

Your total score for this section is: 10/15

Your scores for each question:
1. 2/3
2. 2/3
3. 2/3
4. 2/3
5. 2/3

Possible corrections

1- The parking is in front of the airport terminal.
2- The street where many cars parked is so quiet.
3- There are four people talking about their job outside the lobby.
4- The woman is choosing the very fresh and good foods at the market.
5- The train arrives on time as the man waits.

Additional Aid

You were subtracted one point for not having a capital letter and a punctuation mark for each sentence.

Had I not subtracted one point from each sentence due to capitalization and punctuation you would have scored 14/15.

A lobby is a vestibule or a hall

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PostSubject: Feedback/Score for lampou   Fri Jan 11, 2008 7:00 pm

lampou wrote:
[1]THERE ARE SO MANY CARS IN FRONT OF THE AIRPORT TERMINAL.

2.IN THIS COUNTRY THE STREETS ARE SO NARROW, THERE THIS NO SPACE TO PARK.
3.FOYR PEOPLE STANDING INFRONT OF THE BUILD THEY ARE TALKING EACH OTHER BUT I DO NOT KNOW THE SUBJECT THEY ARE TALKING ABOYT.
4.
THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS TO BUY IN A MARKET!BUT THE PRICES ARE VERY DIFFERENT!IS THE QUALITY WRIGHT;
5.AS THE TRAIN IS NOT COMING THE MAN PROPABLY LOST HIS APPOINTMENT!

Hello lampou.
Thank you for attempting Part 1 of onlinenglish’s TOEIC writing test.

This section (Q. 1-5) is graded out of 15 points, with up to 3 points total for each of your sentences. Take into account that to get a perfect 3, your sentence must be grammatically correct, use correct spelling, use both word prompts, and have a clearly meaningful connection to the picture concerned.

Your total score for this section is: 9/15

Your scores for each question:
1. 2/3
2. 2/3
3. 1/3
4. 2/3
5. 2/3

Possible corrections

1. There are so many cars in front of the airport terminal.
2. In this country the streets are so narrow; there is no space to park.
3. Four people standing in front of the building are talking to each other about an unknown subject.
4. There are so many things to buy in a market at very different prices.
5. As the train is coming in late the man probably missed his appointment!

Additional Aid

1. Do not write your entire sentences using capital letters. There is no evidence indicating if you know how to use capital letters.

2. Keep your sentences simple. You are graded on your ability to describe a picture without committing any grammar and spelling mistakes.

3. Reread your sentences before submitting them. For example, in sentence 3, you lost an additional point because you did not use the word 'about'.

_________________
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Yannick O'Neill
Managing Director: www.onlinenglish.net
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PostSubject: TOEIC Writing questions 1-5   Sat Feb 02, 2008 5:30 pm

There is a bus stop in front of the airport terminal.
There are so many cars parked in the street that I've decided to go away.
I can't imagine why he is talking to that people about you.
The tomatoes you find in this market are very well-grown.
As he waits for the train, he thinks about his past.
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PostSubject: TOEIC Writing questions 1-5   Sat Feb 16, 2008 7:08 pm

This beautiful sightseeing is in a front of airport terminal.
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PostSubject: TOEIC Writing questions 1-5   Sat Feb 16, 2008 7:21 pm

2. The street looks so quiet.
3. There are four people talking about something.
4. The market is very crowded now.
5. The man is waiting for the train as if it arrives late.
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PostSubject: TOEIC Writing questions 1-5   Thu Feb 21, 2008 12:10 pm

In this picture they are showing the front entrance of airport terminal.
The street in this picture is so narrow.
The man in suite is explaining about some thing.
The market is very busy.
As he came late he missed the train.
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PostSubject: question 1-5   Wed Feb 27, 2008 12:33 am

The airport terminal from my city is large enough to accommodate a wide parking lot for cabs and cars and a bus station in the front of it.

When we went to Frankfurt we spent one day walking on the narrow streets that were so crowded of cars at that time than I had never seen any where before.

In front of the university we found a group of students talking about the exam they had just finished before.

We went shopping and tried to find some very fresh tomatoes and yellow potatoes on the ecologic market place .

Mr Smith is ready to go to Budapest as soon as the train is coming to the train station and is wandering if he can get in time to the meeting.
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PostSubject: TOEIC Writing questions 1-5   Fri Mar 21, 2008 12:25 pm

There are alot of cars in front of the airport terminal
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PostSubject: TOEIC Writing questions 1-5   Fri Mar 21, 2008 12:41 pm

There are alot of cars in front of the airport termianl
The street is so narrow
Those peole are talking about work
The market is very crowded now
The train has left as he came
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melisse
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PostSubject: toeic WRITNG QUESTION 1   Tue May 27, 2008 11:38 pm

there are buses in front of the terminal airport
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ym
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PostSubject: Re: Answer submissions for Part 1 / Questions 1-5   Sat May 31, 2008 3:04 am

A lot of cars are parked in front of the airport
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ngoc
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PostSubject: TOEIC Writing questions 1-5   Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:27 pm

There are many cars in front of the airport terminal.
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ngoc
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PostSubject: TOEIC Writing questions 1-5   Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:51 pm

1. There are many cars in front of the airport terminal.
2. The street is so narrow.
3. Some people are talking about their works.
4. The market are very crowded.
5. The train comes as the man is looking at his watch.
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Eric
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PostSubject: Re: Answer submissions for Part 1 / Questions 1-5   Fri Aug 15, 2008 9:23 am

There is no traffic congestion at the front of the airport terminal.
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PostSubject: TOEIC Writing questions 1-5   Sun Aug 17, 2008 9:57 pm

1. There is a parking lot in front of the airport terminal.
2.There are so many cars on the street.
3.Four people are talking about somethings.
4.The market is very crowded.
5.The man was looking at his watch as the train came.
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